Krista Millet — Night Club in Provo

ALL reviews about Krista Millet

• Sierra

  Added 2015.04.28

  I love to get down with my bad self at Krista Millet! It looks like a house from the outside, but on the inside is a HUGE nightclub, full with a chocolate milk bar. When you first step in you are greeted by a burlesque security guard who informs you of tonight's specials and gives you a high five and a down low, unless you're too slow. Personally I've never met Mrs Krista Millet, the legendary owner of this fine establishment, but legend has it that she appears once every year and whoever happens to be at the club that night gets a goodie bag full of solid gold. When the clock hits midnight balloons drop from the ceiling and it gets kinda loud, because people pop them. That's okay though, it's just human nature to pop a balloon. The music choice at Krista Millet is what the kids call "off the chain, dawg!". Playing hits such as "The Candy Man Can", "Sleeping Double on a Waterbed", and the entire Muppets in Manhattan Soundtrack. As far as snacks go, my personal favorite is the golden, crispy, saucy Horse Meat Hot Pocket. Although some of my friends tend to get either Pig-Eye Pasta, or the famous "Still-Frozen" Kid Cuisine platter. If you go to Krista Millet make sure you have appropriate attire, they have a somewhat strict dress code. They require that all men wear a turquoise quilt, with a white shirt and tie. The shirt however can be a light grey or pink, because it's pretty dark so you can probably get away with it. The ladies need to wear a yellow jumpsuit, similar to the orange ones you see in prison. No shoes are allowed for either sex. When you go to Krista Millet, make sure you tell them "Buddy Boy" sent you and you'll get a 35% discount on any food item over 10$ and a pair of miniature dentures that hop around everywhere after you wind them up.